honey milk wa okonomi de
I am really tired of being alive and i keep thinking and idealizing what it’s going to be like when i’m far away from everyone i know and out of school and i have my own life. i hate thinking of [] so much, i hate that there’s always going to be some kind of [] that i’m thinking of and that it was just something else before like i’m never going to really be me there’s always going to be me and then whatever i’m tethered to!!!! and i try so hard to seperate myself out and like feel as if i have some kind of true me or that everything else is just a layer and it’s like dude. All of you is you too.. even [__] is you and everything you think about is you. And it is really frustrating to come to that conclusion because i am really not in control of anything i just exist and im with the earth and im just here and everything sucks right now so much and when a double decker bus crashes into us doooododoodooo
im tired.!! i’m tired !!!!! i’ve also been. trying to figure out what’s wrong. So that when something happens i can not blame myself but even the wrong thing is me and that’s still me that i am blaming altogether. i think it’s like okay man you are never going to win……. that’s fine.. there’s no winning.. it’s just being alive